Should we be angry at the society that made
them vulnerable or the ladies who have decided to take it out on the society
anyhow? Many ladies for one reason or the other live this way with the belief
that they are enjoying life. It is because they don't know the truth about
their sexuality. Understand this, what you don't know you pay for. It hurts to
live like a pauper not knowing that you are a queen. It hurts to waste valuable
energy on what wouldn't profit you.
Our parents were too shy to teach us, so we
became victims of ignorance. Picking lies from the streets and pleasure
seekers' materials. Except we know what sex is and why we feel the way we feel
we might just remain in bondage, chained to strange desires.
The big question is what does sex mean to
'the woman'? What should the woman do with sex?
As a young person I have been bothered by
the word 'sexuality'. I realize that nobody wants to talk about it. The three
letter-word 'sex' stings like scorpion. The pious calls it a taboo, our parents
regard it as shameful, our teachers talk about it in whispers. Yet in every
dark corner sex is painted in 'red and blue'.
In recent times however, we have come to
regard sex not just as something shameful but something dangerous because of
how we've painted it. Hollywood
depicts it as instinctual and animalistic. Adverting industry sees it as a
soft-sell (strategies to sell their products) and the society as Carpe Diem. An
idea that has become a common thought to seize the pleasures of the moment
without thoughts for the future.
Virtually, all young people in the 21st
century have this carpe diem attitude towards sex. To them, every opportunity
to have sex must not be wasted.
They must seize the pleasure of the moment
for tomorrow it might not be. This is the opposite of what our Nation teaches
with very many billboard campaigning against the spread of HIV/AIDS, asking our
youth to use condoms (CD).
The situation is pathetic due to the fact
that Hollywood ,
the youth favourite, teaches the opposite. They paint sex as instinctual and
animalistic. All their pictures are
saying,’ if you feel like doing it jump on a partner.’ They will tell you, CD
is for married people. Sex today is ruled by instinct, not reason. It is
unfortunate that this generation has bought the Hollywood
doctrines wholesale. There is no rationality about sex anymore. They dress
prepared; they feel like it, they do it. It is happening in our classrooms, on
our streets and any ceremony at all.
I want you to know however that sex is what
you can easily come by. You can do it when the first thought comes to mind, but
you can't easily walk away from it. Once it is done there is no reversal,
whatever is done is eternal.
The woman has become a symbol of sex and no
creature has been as used and abused as the woman since the days of Venus. They
took Venus and turned her into a symbol of sex instead of love.
To
most men, sex is a weapon. They always count women they've had sex with as
their conquers, while thinking of themselves as the conquerors.
Any woman that is pretty now is nothing but
a piece of sex material. You wonder why everything a woman is seeking for right
now, she must buy with her body. This is it; you have been taken as a symbol of
sex and nothing more.
What is sex really all about? As far as I am
concerned, it is physical exertion that involves ramming it in, with bumping
away and grinding. It is simply chemical, evaporating with the energy and
sweat.
But it can be wonderful when kept in its
boundaries, its boundaries is marriage. In marriage unfeigned love is involved
and selfishness is ruled out. Both partners are selfless souls trying to please
each other. Outside marriage selfishness rules and 'feeling good' reigns, the
reason why some men treat you like a whore and yet claim they love you.
Premarital sex is what I call an ego
booster, a challenge, a weapon, a trauma, a pastime, a Tranquillizer, an
insult, a game etc. Today, values and respect are buried at the altar of sex.
Partners have sex only to turn around on each other’s neck, and mock, abuse,
hurt, disgrace etc, each other.
Except you keep sex in it proper place, men
will continue to use you only to boost their ego. They will play it as a game,
and make you think you are the one using them. They will use you as their gym
where they work out whenever they want to have a pastime.
I have interviewed numerous ladies and have
heard all manner of erroneous/ignorant statements like 'I am normal, how dare
you ask me not to respond to the hormones that make me human.’ ‘I have got
feelings why then do you try to restrict me.’ ‘I can't do without sex, I am
active, young and burning.'
The feelings, the urges are normal, when you
hit puberty you will sure have those feelings. Why are the feelings there? So
you can exact it on sex? No, capital NO! Just because a person feels one way
does not make it right. Sometimes we feel like killing people who make us
angry! Does that make it right?
Sadly enough, we want to validate every
crazy feeling we have concerning sex. Sex is primarily for procreation and when
it is rightly done, what is called 'love making', it becomes a bond that
cements intimacy. If you don't keep sex in it proper place it can be very
destructive. It is like fire, you can use it to cook, it can keep you warm yet
it can be very ravaging.
All I want you to understand is that sex is
not love, but it can be a seal with which love can be sealed. It doesn't come
before love and it is not the same as love. Sex without love is spelt
H-E-A-R-T-B-R-E-A-K.
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